blog post #5 final

“I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it’s the government.”

“I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.”

“I don’t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.”

“I intend to live forever, or die trying.”

“It’s interesting that these themes of crime and political corruption are always relevant.”

“There’s no such thing as simple. Simple is hard.”

“We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.”

“I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but by pointing out its flaws?”

“Maybe every other American movie shouldn’t be based on a comic book. Other countries will think Americans live in an infantile fantasy land where reality is whatever we say it is and every problem can be solved with violence.”

“When the going gets tough, the tough get an Uzi”

“How I wish, how I wish you were here
We’re just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl
Year after year
Running over the same old ground
What have we found?
The same old fears
Wish you were here”

“Home, home again
I like to be here when I can
When I come home cold and tired
It’s good to warm my bones beside the fire
Far away across the field
The tolling of the iron bell
Calls the faithful to their knees
To hear the softly spoken magic spells ”

“If you should go skating on the thin ice of modern life, dragging behind you the silent reproach of a million tear-stained eyes, don’t be surprised when a crack in the ice appears under your feet”

“If the cloud bursts thunder in your ear, you shout and no one seems to hear. And if the band you’re in starts playing different tunes, I’ll see you on the dark side of the moon”

“Well, nobody’s perfect.”

“One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don’t know.”

“Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!”

“Wait a minute, wait a minute. You ain’t heard nothin’ yet!”

“Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac…It’s in the hole! It’s in the hole! It’s in the hole!”

“Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals … except the weasel.”

“Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill a Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin… but what good does that do me?”

“Oooh, so Mother Nature needs a favor?! Well maybe she should have thought of that when she was besetting us with droughts and floods and poison monkeys! Nature started the fight for survival, and now she wants to quit because she’s losing. Well I say ‘hard cheese.’’

“If I owned a company, my employees would love me. They’d have huge pictures of me up the walls and in their home, like Lenin.”

“I tolerate lactose like I tolerate people.”

“Anything that’s for free, people will take. They don’t discriminate.”

“Sometimes I start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope to find it along the way.”

“My philosophy is basically this. And this is something that I live by. And I always have. And I always will. Don’t ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what. No matter … where. Or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or … or where you’ve been … ever. For any reason, whatsoever.”

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